January 15, 2013;


My daughter had surgery yesterday, her third back surgery.  The success rates on back surgeries decreases with each one but she has lived in so much pain that it was worth the risk.  She came through it fine, she walked today and she's on enough pain medications to put a rhinoceros to sleep but she's doing well.


My youngest has court tomorrow in Indio...enough said. 


I had a long talk with a friend of mine I couldn't figure out why things had gone in this direction.  I still don't know completely, but what I do is that I can speak the Word until things turn around.  I believe that sometimes we are in the middle of spiritual warfare before we know we're in spiritual warfare.  Sometimes things start happening one thing after another and they increase until finally everything acts like a tornado in the middle of your life.


If I were to step back and evaluate the events I would say that my daughter having surgery has been planned now for about a year.  We knew that her previous surgery did not take and if we wanted things to get better for her so she could have a life we were going to have to go through this whole process.  She wasn't able to work, or go to her kids school or sports functions.  She couldn't go shopping or do anything for that matter. So....if things were going to improve in her life we were going to have to allow her to go off of work and get the surgery she needed.  So now the hard part is over and recovery begins.  This is a good thing her back has been corrected now she can heal and have a life.  So really I can't count this as a negative.


My youngest is going through a process that will probably save her life.  I prayed for months that the seed of the righteous would be delivered.  I prayed and I prayed.  She went deeper and deeper into the meth and the illegal events.  Finally at 102 lbs it was over and she went in.  I cried all the way to work (45 minute drive) and all the way home for a few days.  I asked God about his Word and why He didn't deliver her.  In a very quiet voice in the depth of my being I heard him say "I did,  she would be dead".   When she was at home I never heard from her.  I hurt over her all the time and I never saw her.  I had thoughts of having to bury her and I prayed against it. Now I talk to her sometimes twice a day.  I love talking to her, she sounds like she did when she was younger.  But all I want to do is bring her home and wrap her up in my arms and hold her so hard and never let her go again.  So even though this isn't fun, her situation is improved.  She is alive, she is receiving the help that she needs, and we talk everyday.  So again I can't really count this as a negative.


My God is faithful especially through the storm.  Even when I can't seem Him I know He's working all things for my good and for my children's good.  I know that He is their Father and loves them more than I do.  So my job is to continue in prayer and speaking out the Word and his promises.  It's hard sometimes my mind gets fuzzy and weighed down and I can't think, I can't focus.  Then things get really hazy for me but the minute I speak the Word it all changes.  Now if I can just remember to do it at the beginning instead of in the middle.