April 17, 2013;

Have you ever had a friend that always had a way of making you feel bad, really bad about yourself, your life, just everything.  And for whatever reasons you kept going back for more, believing with all of your heart that they cared about you, they were a true friend, they didn't mean what they said they were just having a bad day.  Or quite possibly they didn't mean what they did, or the way they forgot you it's just because they're under so much pressure.  There are a number of excuses you could make for their behavior, none of them are legitimate, they're excuses and sometimes when you can't come up with one they'll even supply one to you that will reason they're behavior away. 

You know what I'm talking about, it's that friend that will give you the highest compliment verbally, but somehow won't include you in things.  Or maybe they'll talk with you, use your ideas, even use you for a counselor but not include you in anything.  I think the key word was use you.

Then there are those unsaid spiritual or residual feelings you get after that person leaves.  You don't really know why but your depresssed, lonely, hopeless and sometimes you feel so overwhelmingly beyond hope sad you end up sobbing hysterically wondering how could you end everything without anyone nothing.  Why do you feel this way? They didn't say anything what happened? You didn't feel that way before they showed up why now?

Well, all of us carry stuff with us, you could call it baggage, head noise, one of my friends calls it the committee in her head.  Some people carry stuff with them that they don't even know is there, it came with them from their birth and has haunted them ever since.  And if your real sensitive you can feel it.  It's not so much that it's your problem or meant for you or even part of your make-up.  It's actually meant for them, it's been with them and haunts them and now your experiencing a transferance.  Very similar to feeling empathy for someone, but you're not feeling something for them, something that haunts them is trying to place itself on you. 

Seriously have you ever been around someone who was sooo depressed and you left them feeling soooo depressed and then suddenly you're having a bad day.  Yup, transferance.  Have you ever watched a violent show and then felt like you wanted to go hurt someone?  Yup, transferance. 

The key of course if prayer, because God heals, but you have to learn to love yourself enough to say no, you're not doing this to me.  It's one thing with a stranger, you do walk away, but we don't with those we love we just take it.  Well, no.  We need to guard our hearts and minds, surround ourselves with those things that are good and lovely.  Now all of this is just good common sense but it's also biblical. 

God doesn't see us as worthless, or not good enough and he never treats us as less.  Sometimes we just have to walk away.