December 1, 2013;

Tomorrow is a big day for me I start my new job while still working my old one.  And apparently Gloria is not going to play the piano and she is not going to call and cancel...so I'm playing.  And tomorrow I start my dissertation course class.  Now I'm very excited about that it's been the direction I have worked towards and now its here.  There isn't a negative in the bunch I just want to do well. It appears that my direction is working within crisis intervention and the care mental health patients receive during these times.  It's a work close to my heart and one I'm very passionate about.  At the same time its the subject of my dissertation so it would appear that God is working everything in that direction.  I'm not completely sure what he's doing but whatever it is I'm going with Him.

My friend is finally having her dream come true she will be teaching an in depth study on Acts for the first time.  She has always wanted to do this and she's so good and has so much information I know I'll be going.  The Word says that He will give us the desires of our hearts and I am seeing some miracles take place and hearts desires come true. 

As I see God working and things unfolding I realize that I have a problem receiving from God.  I have worked hard all of my life and I think that I fully believed I would always work hard without much expectation of good.  So now watching God bless me I realize that receiving is very difficult for me and I'm wondering how many blessings I have not received from God simply because I refused to receive.  When he starts making things better I almost become afraid and yet the Word tells us that he teaches us to prosper, he prospers us.  So weird.  I never realized that I was sabotaging myself and if I can't believe God to give me good things how could I ever expect good things from a man?  How could I have any expectations of a relationship of any kind if I can't believe that I am able to expect good things from God? 

Well I'm excited things are about to change for me.