January 27, 2013;

I have more experience with addicts than many people, not most just many.  I've watched drugs, pills and alcohol decompose people's bodies and minds, families and lives.  It's a battle from the pit of hell, it grabs you by the throat and won't let go, then when it has you it goes for your loved ones and everything you own. 

I had a very dear girl come to me about her pill habit the other night.  Purcoset, nasty drug, highly addictive and when your body tells you the doctor isn't giving you enough they are for sale on the street.  All over the place.  It is no respecter of person or socioeconomic situation, rich, poor, educated and noneducated.  It works like meth only better.  You feel good you're not short tempered, you can get along with everyone and keep going.  Until one day when there is none on the street for a minute.

Then the body aches, the head hurts, you're throwing up, everything is getting on your nerves and you can't sleep for anything.  Oh and your mind refuses to shut down so you start to think you are going crazy.  Yup, withdrawals.  That lie of the devil that says come play with me doesn't it feel good?  And what??? You don't want to play??? Now your gonna hurt YUP. 

Shes been taking approximately 15 a day prescibed and off the street.  Then there were none.  For days none.  All the withdrawal symptoms in full force.  In my backyard spilling her guts telling me whats been going on.  I knew.  I've known there was a problem for a while but now we could deal with it.  It's been 4 days and she's about to jump out of her skin but she's hanging in there.  She made a deal to buy some but she mistakenly text my number so I got the message.  Mistake or not weve been talking through it. 

It's hard to watch young women struggle in their lives.  I want the best for them.  I want them to be happy and loving their lives and choices.  But it's a process so today I'm just standing by a friend and listening to her complain about not feeling well and counting the minutes until she starts to feel better.  Praying for her quietly and just hanging out with her when she drops in. 

This is my life.